I Born Again

I experienced the miracle of Ibogaine for the first time on June 19, 1995, at around 11:30. Within 10 minutes of ingestion I began to feel an upward flow of energy through my legs. As I laid down in bed I noticed I felt a sense of lightness in my body.

I then tell my two friends a cosmic joke I made up on the spot about two angels discussing whether they should incarnate again on earth.

I began to experience a fast up-and-down vibration of pulsing waves coursing through me, down at the atomic and cellular level. I’m de-structuring. I say to my friends that I feel as if this were Ascension, escaping to higher vibratory level of existence. I dissolve and begin “oozing” into the universe. This is going to be fun!

I close my eyes. My Father is standing before me. He runs off to my right and behind me until he goes out of my view. I realize that Dad has run away.

I tell my companions that the theme I’ve chosen for my session is joy. My girlfriend is delighted by my choice.

***I hear voices outside the room speaking Spanish. Its the crew. ***They remind me of something. It slowly dawns on me that it is my birth. I relate to my companions that I was born in a house in Lima, Peru — a couple of blocks from the ocean and that there were several women, including my doctor, talking during the proceedings… I have returned to the womb.

Images — especially faces — appear on what looks like a sighting screen close to me. The unknown faces move to the left and dissolve away.

I start laughing, it’s all so funny. God is an old man, a comedian, a Jewish George Burns. Every time I think of something negative he immediately tells me a one-liner that is just hilarious and I bust-up. Its so funny. I’m in stitches. Deep belly laughter, uncontrollably bending me, I double over.

I ask my friends to come over and put their hands on my heart. I reach over and touch their shoulders- making a human energy circuit.

“Hi Mom, Hi Dad”, I tell them with glee.

I see three-dimensional, very coherent images and symbols, unfamiliar buildings, collages of unknown meaning and design. It’s beautiful. Brightly reflecting, bold bubble gum cartoon colors and soft phosphorescent electric pastels.

A big round kaleidoscope-like structure filled with television screens like a huge compound eye dominates my view. Each screen with a face, each impacting me in some way. This is ibogaine.

A hot molten lava heaviness in my stomach, rising up as I laugh. It worries me, I don’t want to throw up.

More jokes and skits. More laughter, I move across the bed.

I sense that one of my friends has concerns about the amount of movement. Most people are immobilized by the effect of ibogaine and stay very still. His worry worries me. I want to please him, but I’m compelled to be in motion.

The room is spinning and swirling but I’m not dizzy. So I decide to stand up during the second hour of my session. Its hard but not as hard as I thought.

I tell my friends that I am a joke…I am a clown…later I tell them I’m pathetic, and then, that I am “making light” of everything. I am light. I say to my girlfriend “it’s one moment of pure beauty”.

Time has no meaning.

A huge eye comes at me, I go into the darkness of the eye.

I put on music — angelic music — it’s wonderful. Sweeping me outward.

As if they had an intelligence all their own, my hands move in graceful wing-like movements to the sound of music. My fingers sense feathery plumes of energy erupting from my arms and torso.

I rise to a place where an endless thin layer of multi-shaped diamonds are floating across all of space. A carpet of sparkling faceted stones stretching out to infinity.

Nearing the end of the first four hours of peak experience I tell my girlfriend that I feel sick. She gets worried. A little later she leaves for work. I tell her I’ll be fine. Minutes later, I throw up hot brown liquid 3 or 4 times and feel better. Soon my other friend leaves and I’m alone. I feel peace. By the seventh hour I’m up and dancing to jazz in the living room, feeling elated.

The next day, after a sleepless but wonderful night. I am wary of eating because I have this small coin sized lava-wafer burning inside of me. I eat a huge breakfast and then to my surprise I understand that the fiery message from my stomach is, “Give me fuel- Now! Eat!” Life is bubbly and supercharged with delightful energy. Life is new and wonderful. I feel happy and content. I love ibogaine.


I move faster. My body feels lighter — the very structure of matter is somehow charged up — moving at higher and faster rates. I feel different in my body. The space of who I am, my personal space, has no boundaries. My sense of time has shifted. I can do so much more in minutes, effortlessly.

Little by little I become aware that my markers or referent for Sleep, Hunger, and even Sex have all been blown out. The feelings and sensations that let me know are gone. As the days progress I begin to discover new signals and what they mean. Chocolate Chip cookies are too sweet, sex is more making love, I sleep less.

Years ago, I was taught that flexibility is one of the keys to being successful in our complex world. Since realizing that, I had started to learn ways of being flexible. Only recently had I discovered that my flexibility was being limited by the fact that I was only learning to be flexible from one fixed point. My new goal was to become flexible from any point — even while I was in motion.

Ibogaine unravels all our set patterns, putting everything in motion, in flux. Even while it was de-constructing the world around me, the accelerating power of the Iboga was sending me outward to a level of fluidity where I could still reconfigure myself while the universe danced all around me. Flexibility in motion. What was Captain Nemo used as his motto? Mobilis in Mobili — movement in motion.

My goals for my Ibogaine experience were: 1. Joy/Enthusiasm 2. Vitality 3. Appreciation/Gratitude 4. Prosperity/Riches 5. Fat Addiction 6. Sugar Addiction 7. Transcend Consensus Reality

I got all that and more.

My sister-in-law calls me out of the blue, after 5 years of silence, asking for advice as to how to help her family. Her intuition has picked up on my shift.

I give away my car — it was old baggage I was clinging to out of fear of scarcity. The old is giving way to the new.

I begin again. I be again I be a gain. I bo gain.


The Mitsogho tribe of Africa use the root of the “eboka” to seek out the Bwiti, the spirit of their ancestors and the God of Iboga. During their visionary experience they also fully expect to meet up with the father and mother of humankind. This represents their rite of passage from adolescence to manhood. For them they will only experience the Bwiti again at death.

I find myself saying “Man…” frequently. I have found maturity.

For months prior to using ibogaine, I talk — half in fun and half seriously — about the “Iboga God”. A few days before I have my transformational spiritual experience with eboka, I abbreviated it into “Ibogod”. On the second day of my journey I am illuminated by a more expansive — yet humble — realization of my divine self: “I be God.” Are we not made in his image?

Ibogaine accelerates personal evolution.

It is like rainwater, which naturally flows to the lowest level. From there it moves you upwards toward healing, transcending and integrating the issues. As you move vertically you hit blocks — ceilings”. At these choice points, you can decide to face them or not. If you have the key information that unlocks these stuck-states you rapidly break through to the next level. If you do not have the crucial data you cannot cut through these stoppers, and will begin to spiral downwards endlessly, lost in a torturous vicious cycle.

It works you, you work it, and it works.

Days later I was still gleefully proclaiming the merits of ibogaine. My girlfriend says its like I “got religion.” “No”, I tell her, “I got God.”

When Adam and Eve are tossed out of the Garden of Eden, God placed an Angel — a Cherub — at the edge of the garden with a flaming sword to stand guard. Like those internal stoppers and stuck-states, its job was to keep anyone from returning and eating of the fruit of another tree — The Tree of Life. Eating of this tree gives everlasting life.

Ibogaine is a variation of the Tree of Life. It has the capacity to help us achieve a new relationship with ourselves by assisting us to attain a never before achieved relationship between God and Self.

On the first night, while still on ibogaine, I uncovered the reason I couldn’t stay still during my journey and go inward like many others do. It was because that was exactly what I had been doing exclusively most of my life — going inside myself — especially the last 10 years of “inner work”.

The ibogaine “knew” it was time for me to go outward — way out. Out to true reality, out to God. My inner experience of God met the outer experience of God. God expanded into something greater than my physical Father (who art in heaven). And mother God took a form and depth greater than my physical Mother. And the two Gods, male and female, merged into a greater union. And there was profound joy and deep laughter. I knew God afresh with all my senses and beyond them.

A new God results in a new Man. Or Woman.

I am new. I am happy.

An angel is standing before what looks like a set of huge tubes, waiting for another. Finally, the other angel comes by. The first angel says to the other, “Hey, wanna go with me?”

The second angel responds: “Go where?”

The first one points to the mouth of one of the nearest tubes. “To Earth, of course”. “No way. Are you crazy? The water’s bad. Last time I went I died of dysentery. It was horrible.”

“Ya, but you’re forgetting all the fun you had chasing after that red-headed priestess and those wild deer hunts we went on. Remember?”

“Ya they were real entertaining but…”

“Come on, you know it’s starting to get a bit boring up here. And besides, they’ve got television now.”

“Really, that’s great. Naw, I don’t think so.”

The first angel looks up and down the hallway to see if anyone is nearby, and then leans forward, real close to the second angel, and whispers: “Now don’t let this out of the bag, But now”, he pauses for effect, “they’ve got ibogaine!”

The second angel is shocked. But then a smile slowly comes to his face and says: “Then what are we waiting for? Lets go! This is going to be fun!”

At one point during the first 4 hours of being on ibogaine I exclaimed: “Ibogaine is better than VR”. Wouldn’t it be funny if Life on Earth were really just a holodeck experience made for the entertainment of angels — their version of Virtual Reality?

But recently, Life here has bogged down in rules, red tape, regulations, and bureaucracy. Nobody from heaven wants to come down because its no fun anymore. But now there’s Ibogaine. Now we can resurrect our spirits, re-experience heaven and remember why we came here in the first place: to bring our individual facet of heaven here to earth. Why else would we want to return?